My son, 18- months old, is still very young to show his appreciation to me. In fact he showed his tantrum over lunch whereby he refused to eat the food I cook. Picky eater this one! Hopefully next year will be worth celebrating Mother’s Day when he is able to say I love you, Mummy!
So I’m going to dedicate this post for my mom, to remind me about all the sacrifices she has made throughout her life, from the moment she held the title, Mummy, in 1982. She is the most selfless human being I’ve ever known. I guess it’s ingrained in her due to her upbringing, as an adopted child, where she had no choice but to put away all her needs and wants every time. I definitely saw that in her. The word “tired” is never in her dictionary.
The most apparent and critical time was when my late dad fell ill in 2012 – lost his eye sight in 2012 and he had to to be on dialysis every day from 9pm to about 8am. As the breadwinner, my mom still had to work during the day and then took care of my dad from evening till night. She even had to wake up early in the morning to prepare lunch and dinner. In early 2015, my mom had to stop working because my dad’s condition had worsened. She took care of him every day and night. My dad’s siblings felt indebted to her because they didn’t think someone would be able to take care of their brother as perfect as my mom. They didn’t even think they could do the same for their spouse.
There were many occasions when my dad had to be hospitalized a couple of nights, sometimes a week, and my mom actually slept on a plastic chair every night. My sisters and I tried to take turns but she refused to. So we helped her during the day instead. But whatever we did, could never commensurate with what and how she took care of my late dad, until the very end of his last breath in late 2015. And the most humbling part of her is that she never had any expectations or rewards from anyone, including her daughters.
I guess you can never separate the word ‘sacrifice’ from a mom’s title. For some people, it came naturally. For some people, they learn the hard way. For some people, they tried to find the balance between being selfless and selfish at the same time. But for my mom, it was never ever about her and that’s something that my sisters and I can never repay her. We hope that God will bless her with Jannah one day, insyaAllah.
Everyday, I pray for my mom’s health and happiness and I remind myself to be a better daughter. But as we all know, we can never be a perfect wife, perfect mom, perfect daughter, perfect daughter in law all at once, every day because life is not perfect as such. In the end, we carry the guilt as if we if we have not done enough. So this post is to remind myself to take almost every opportunity that I have to be the perfect daughter whenever I’m with her.
Happy Mother’s Day Mummy dearest! Love you very much.